Player Profile: Chris Disensi

Chris is one of the three amigos who joined the Shockers this season. A fierce and versatile competitor that helped solidify the foundation for the rebirth of the team. Born in Montreal’s Little Italy in ‘76, he was the 9^th DiSensi kid that Leonarda gave birth to. His mother [Leonarda Disensi] spent most of her time taking care of the big family. Between 1955 and 1976 she gave birth to 4 girls and 5 boys. His father [Leandro Disensi] was a successful businessmen, the family owned a prosperous import/export company. The family activity was mostly oriented towards the traditional Italian imports: olive oil, red wine and various other items requested by local grocery stores and restaurants.

At an early age Chris understood that he would eventually be taking over the business with his brothers and sisters. After he got his high school diploma, he dropped out and spent endless hours making the business grow. In his 20’s, he was getting tired of the routine and was looking for new opportunities and avenues. The brothers and sisters decided to open a restaurant; the four sisters put all their efforts to make this a success story. Things were going well; the brothers taking care of the import/export and the sisters made the restaurant one of the most popular joints of the neighborhood.

Everything Chris was touching resulted in a success story, but the success was getting to his head. The expensive clothes, the fancy shoes, the sports cars, running bills and alcohol was making Chris spin out of control. One night at a family reunion, after too many shots of Grappa, his big mouth got him in trouble. An anonymous source said he had been watching the movie Scarface over and over and was suffering from delusions of grandeur… Chris believed he was Tony Montana. It was time for a change, he chugged the bottle of Grappa, stole a truck from the family warehouse and just drove away…

His little roadtrip to nowhere brought him all the way to Las Vegas. He decided he was going to start from scratch and make his way back to the top. Vegas was the place for a big shot like him. The truck had a few cases of olive oil and a Spiderman suit, Chris knew that was worth shit… He started a Spiderman street act with a local Rod Stewart wannabe (you can see Chris’s act here) but it was obvious that he couldn’t compete with Cirque du Soleil. Always thinking, he printed some new labels and the remaining olive oil was transformed into some sensual massage oil which he titled, “The DiSensitizer.”

He provided for every hooker on the strip with this magic oil. He quickly made friends with them and in a matter of weeks he was the biggest pimp of Vegas… Winner, winner, chicken diner! But everything is bigger in Vegas, it was just a question of time before someone else showed up to stole the spotlight. Chris didn’t care too much though; he had made a killing and didn’t have to worry about money anymore. He decided he was going to stay a while in Vegas and then move on…

After throwing away most of his fortune in the slot machines he decided to head back up to hometown Montreal. His good friend Donald “Brown Rocket” Toohey hooked him up with a place in Verdun and Chris just started again with the Spiderman act. Verdump was not ready for that act and neither was Toohey. Toohey told him straight up that one more Spiderman dance move or whistle would force to kick him out on the street. Chris decided to go back and apologize to the family… He’s back on the payroll driving the delivery truck and taking care of his Nona.