Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Time Change for Sunday's Game

Please note that the time of the game on Sunday, November 2nd has been changed to 8:30pm instead of the previously scheduled time of 10:30pm.

Also, bring your navy blue shirt to the game as we will need to wear that one for the game. For those of you who do not have a navy Shockers shirt, bring a blue, navy or even black shirt just in case the spare Shockers shirts do not fit you.

To recap: Sunday, November 2nd against the Decepticons is @ 8:30pm.

Bring your navy Shockers shirt!

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Don't Call it a Comeback


Shockers goals against the Expos

The Shockers were left scratching their heads last night as they suffered their fourth straight loss in a come from behind victory by the Expos, 6-5. The Expos, who have been struggling to find their game since being league champs this past summer, were able to capitalize on a handful of Shocker mistakes and turnovers.

Shockers looked solid showing up to Le Rinque to warm-up with their heads much higher than after their 9-1 whooping from the previous night against the District 5 Knights and a game-plan to go along with it.

"We talked and discussed about it all day, we knew what we had to do," Francois Hamelin commented.

For the first time the Shockers actually looked organized during their discussion before the game and actually had a chant to start them off which, believe in team-spirit or not, helped them jump out to a two goal start within the first shift; one from Ben Ducharme and the other from Andrew Stevens respectively.

Shockers would get back to business when Marc Boucher would find the back of the mesh with a blast from the point. Soon after the Expos would get on the board to make it 3-1 before the end of the first period.

Shockers would open up the second with a second goal from Ducharme that would spark up some pushing and shuving, Jeff Jasmin was quick to intervene to calm the situation down. Check out the video!

"I had to make them crackers don't get on my boys like that, that's all," added Jasmin.

However this would be where the Shockers would go downhill making a series of mistakes and key turnovers that energized the Expos comeback. Expos netted back-to-back goals to make it a four goal scoring route giving them a 5-4 edge until the Shockers responded with a 2-on-1 break out with Gary McDermott and Ben Ducharme which the end result was a Ducharme hat-trick with a beauty Bobby Orr-like flying finish.

With the game tied 5-5, it looked like the game was going to shootouts until the recent streak of bad luck returned to haunt the Shockers where an oddly timed turnover landed the ball on the stick of the Expos and they were able to bang it home for the 6-5 victory.

Despite the loss, the Shockers looked to be moving more than their last couple games, maybe still not as much to keep up with teams like FW and District 5 Knights but it was a better effort. Also, the first period defensive man-to-man coverage was a decent effort and for awhile was remanencant of the Shockers squad that took on the Grinders.

Overall the Shockers have their work cut-out for them when they go to take on the Decepticons next Sunday @ 10:30pm to stop the current losing streak.

Monday, October 27, 2008

It was the Knights' Night

After the Shockers demonstrated one of their most whole-hearted efforts this season in the 5-2 loss to the Grinders last Monday, the Shockers returned to their bad habits and were dismantled 9-1 last night against the all-surprisingly quick District 5 Knights.

The Knights proved to be the balls, bronze and grit as they pummeled the Shockers in all aspects of the game. New-comer Gary McDemott commented: "...their a much younger team, they're quick. Our guys ran out out of steam quick and it looked like we weren't even running or trying to run."

Shockers did not catch any breaks during the game as they had a handful of great opportunities to score but could not seem to find the back of the net. Also, the Shockers bared witness to a bouncing ball that seemed to find its way to an opposing player to bury it passed Giancarlo Capaz. Capaz, despite not enjoying a 9 goal-against night made all the neccessary saves to keep the Shockers in the game but it was the rest of the team that would let him down.

"We got to get the ball out and stop making bad turnovers in our zone," commented Capaz after the game.

One thing that lacked in the Shockers performance was the denfensive man-to-man play that we saw the other night against the Grinders. A game where the forwards were more concentrated on defense rather than looking for the long-bomb breakouts and ended up panning out well for them that night.

"We fell back into our old habits of standing at the other end of the ice looking for the long passes. Their defense were picking off our passes from the point and we were stuck in our zone for more than half the game," explained Andrew Stevens who remained off the scoresheet for the first game this season.

The Shockers will need to have a big game tonight as they take on the struggling Expos to snap a three game losing streak.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Player Profile: Jeff Jasmin




Name: Jefferson Jasmin
Born: June 7 1977, Saint-Bernard-De-Michaudville

6’2” Weight 225
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Jeff was born in a small community, roughly an hour drive north of Montreal. With less then 500 resident, everybody knew each other, a tightly knit community and no need to say that black people we’re not a majority in that area. [Jeff] “The classic story, only black family in a town of crackers…”. His dad, Dany Laferrière-Jasmin showed Jeff he could defend himself with words but Jeff insisted to use the good old punch on the head. He quickly made a name for himself and was invited to be part of the regional Pee-Wee team. Jeff kept the rough stuff on the hockey rink, helping his team to make it all the way to the finals, losing to the Chateauguay Cavaliers (Andrew Stevens would join the Cavaliers a few years later). Dany L.-J. was loved by all the woman of the community, pleasing most of them with his black ding-dong. He actually published a book to train them properly: Dany's L.-J. book . Jeff was closer to his mother, Marcelle Jemima, she was very protective of him, and always there to comfort him with stack’s of pancakes. In 1988 she opened a pancake house, modest family business that slowly turned into a success story. The name Jemima is world famous now and a few Shocker team member have express their love of the tasty syrup [Alain Godard] “That stuff is good, I use it on pancakes, Eggo’s, mincemeat pie… Everywhere, every time all over my body, that’s it! that’s all folks!”. Jeff will eventually be a syrup millionaire, giving him the option to pursue his dream, play hockey [Jeff] “For now him having a blast playing with the Shockers and I want to stick around for a while, we started this shit to win a cup and I'm not leaving before I kissed that thing a couple of times”. Jeff has been seen a few times by fans playing with his rock band “Jeff and the pussy willows” [Jeff] “Preparing my after career, I want to Rock’n’Roll all night bitch and party every day… Live fast, live hard, rocker style... Smack, crack, cocaine… Date rape, glory hole, tranny’s… A bukake of fun!”. The pussy willow's will be performing next Thursday in the parking lot of the Verdun Couche-Tard located 38 Place du Commerce in Verdun. [Jeff] "Come one come all, big party... You get a free 1.18L of Colt45 with every ticket! What, what!!!"


You can see Jeff and the PW Thursday @ 10pm in Verdun (Several Shocker players should attend, unique opportunity to get drunk and clunk with your favorite player). Or pass by the Rinque Next Sunday @ 9:30 and/or Monday @6:30 when the Shockers plays the D-5 Knights and Expos respectively.



Until then, keep your eyes on the ball and your stick on the floor kids…




Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Shockers Down 2 in 2 Games


Highlights of the Shockers vs. Grinders game

Shockers suffered two losses in just two games against two of the hottest teams in the league, FW and Grinders. Sunday night hosted the match-up against the infamous FW who the Shockers have not been able to figure out in club history and Sunday was no exception as FW handed the Shockers their second loss of the season, 9-2.

Shockers tried to keep the goals against low in the first period as they always seemed to have let the opposition get the best of them but FW poured it on netting five in the opening period. FW would roll on from there and not look back. Team captain and current team point leader, Alain Godard, potted a deuce to better his point record this season. Andrew Stevens, Ben Ducharme and Francois Hamelin each picked up an assist. Shockers did look rather dead-footed and lost out on the surface against the great passing plays of FW and it was clear that netminder, Giancarlo Capaz, was not enjoying the bombshelling; he commented on the matter: "It is hard to even try swallow a loss like that when your team looks like it is standing still half the time, we got to keep running and I don't think everyone gave 100%. Look, FW plays well together, and we weren't ready for them."

Despite the game being a rather one-sided affair and was mutually quite boring to spectate the action kicked in in the third period where the Shockers got on the board with Godards pair of goals but also with a five-man brawl to close out the game. Nunchucking dragon hunter, Nick Sullo, duked it out with an opposing player sparking a gathering in front of FW's bench with about 1:30 left to play. Evidently, the game was called soon after the dust and testosterone settled. Sullo would have to serve a game the following night when his team took on the league's team-to-beat, the Grinders.

FW bettered their season record to 2-1 getting both their wins against the Shockers.

Monday night was a whole different team as the Shockers had no choice but to suit up with the least amount of players they have ever played with in club history. Taking on league favorites, the Grinders, it was no easy task, Godard comments: "We played really hard. With such a short bench, guys backing out last minute and not able to fill in those gaps with spares, it was tough."

Shockers played their best first period by far this season playing excellent defense and even scoring one within the first minute of the game when Stevens picked off a lazy pass by the opposing goaltender and dishing it to Godard for the one-timer to the back of the net.

"Dude got caught, straight up!" exclaimed defensive dynamo, Jeff Jasmin.

However, the second period is when the fatigue started to kick in, the Grinders battled back to bang home three quick goals before the period's end.

The third opened up when the Grinders wedged in a rebound passed Capaz and made it 4-1. Shockers answered back after a handful of good opportunities when Godard scored his second of the game making it a 4-2 game but with time winding down the Grinders would put the nail in the coffin with a howitzer of the inside of the post and in the net.

Despite the Shockers valiant effort during this loss the team overall poured their hearts into the game and gave it their all. Jasmin explains, "we worked our asses off out there, we have to be first on the ball all the time, regardless of the situation and that's what we tried to do!"

The Shockers next game is Sunday against the new-comers to the league, the District 5 Knights who have turned some heads with their 3-1 start this season. The Knights handed the Expos two back-to-back losses and then beat FW 8-7 in a close-call game and their only loss was against the Grinders where they were downed 5-3. The Shockers will have Sullo, Sandhu, Ducharme and Pilon back in the line-up and look to have a full bench but only time will tell how the Shockers will bounce back.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Shockers Bounce Back to Smoke Chiefs

Final Score
Shockers 6
Chiefs 4



"It was a nice comeback on our part, we just got to figure out how to play all three periods," stated team captain, Alain Godard in regards of last night's victory against the Chiefs, 6-4.

Shockers once again fell behind in the first period (2-0) marking another straight game where they have experienced a slow start in the first period.

"We haven't figured it all out," added Shockers' scoring leader, Andrew Stevens, "at least we're putting the ball in the net but we have to stop it from going in ours, especially in the first period."

A positive of last night's game is that the Shockers had production from both the first and second line as well as from their defense; including firsts for Nick Sullo, Kosta Kastrounis, and Marc "DFEK" Calavaris.

Despite being down 2-0 after the first period an early second period goal from Kosta Kastrounis' point shot from a face-off deep in Chiefs' territory put the Shockers within one. However, Chiefs would reply with two quick goals to make it a 4-1 game. Shockers battled back when Stevens lit the lamp by burying home a Ben Ducharme shot from the slot and then not even two minutes later Calavaris banged home a feed from Goppy Sandhu to close out the second period at 4-3. The third would be all Shockers when Stevens capitalized on the Chief's goaltender being out of position not once but twice to complete his hat-trick. The game would be ended with Nick Sullo coasting in the nail-in-the-coffin on an open net.

"Les defenses étaient malade en penis, les gars en avant ont jouer bien aussi, Giancarlo [Capaz] a fait son job pis on a pas fourré le chien dans deuxième et troisième. C'est un victoire, pointe finale," commented assistant captain, Marc Boucher, during a post-game interview.

The Shockers will need to step it up next week when they play Sunday and Monday back-to-back against the team to beat, FW and the Grinders respectively.

Game Notables: Ben Ducharme smokes a Chiefs defenseman into the boards at the beginning of the third period to pump up his team, there was no call on the play. On the official scoresheet, Alain "PTB" Godard picked up three assists. Jeff Jasmin rounded up two assists and Kosta Kastrounis got a goal and one assist. Since Kastrounis, Sandhu, Dfek and Sullo each scored a point, there is only one player on the Shockers roster to not have a point, and that is Mr. Jon Sante.

Friday, October 10, 2008

Searching for the Missing Piece of the Puzzle

Many of the players from the Shockers have been sitting around losing a lot of wood from being out of action (both on the ice and in the bedroom) for the past 3 weeks...so much that some have been heard making statements that they possibly forgot how to play hockey.

Captain and pony-tailed phenom commented on the situation: "...it has been pretty tough to keep motivated when you see other teams playing and we're kind of just chilling on the sidelines dicking out."

"Criss... j'ai perdu plein d'bois!" added Marc "The Claw" Boucher.

Despite being sidelined so that the league can catch the newly added Expos up to speed, some Shockers have been discovering other activities to keep them in shape.

"Sex!" announced notorious panty wetter, Nick "Double D" Sullo.

"I like picking apples and drinking beer," added Francois "El Pene de Diablo" Hamelin.

The Shockers will be once again juggling the lines around to try snap the scoring drought of the second line. However, nothing is expected to change for the Stevens-Godard-Ducharme line, there still remains a missing piece to the puzzle for Sullo and Kastrounis to find their scoring touch. Thus far, most of the Shockers production has come from the Stevens-Godard-Ducharme line or from the defense, with the exception of the game Steve Diabo was introduced to the Sullo-Kastrounis duo.

"We need a guy like Steve to come in and help out, but we can't rely on one guy everytime. Everyone needs to work and give 110%," commented new-comer Dwayne Pilon.

"We all know this stuff happens, I mean Nick had a great season in the summer, he put a lot of numbers up. In the summer, I had dick all for points, made me pretty soft but I'm glad I found the back of the net's throat with my shot this season. It will turn around for Nick and Kosta, they just got to keep running and keep digging," lectured Andrew "the Shit Show" Stevens.

The Shockers look to bounce back after their 8-4 loss to FW on Monday when they take on the Chiefs. A new face will be added to the dressing roster and will mark his NABHL debut, Dfek, looks to mix things up for the Shockers line-up.

Monday, October 6, 2008

Player Profile: Marc Boucher



Name: Marc Boucher

Born: October 10th 1980, St-Hyacinthe

5’9” weight: 198

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Boucher was born in 1980, his father was a well known tennis man, Robert Boucher. A native of St. Hyacinthe (Quebec), Robert Boucher was Canada's top ranked tennis player for an amazing eleven consecutive years. His mother, Mary Rose-Anna Travers was a very popular singer, better known as "La Bolduc". They had their first kid in 1980, Marc Boucher, and a second one in 1984, Billy Boucher. He started to skate at the age of 3 and played for various local team from age 5 to his teen years. Marc was a prolific hockey player, noticed by the scouts of several junior teams, he had a brilliant hockey career ahead of him. But he slowly started to lose power in his shot, his accuracy wasn’t what it was, nobody could figure out why he was regressing. His coach, Ron Vanderbush, recalls the downfall of Boucher [Vanderbush] “It was really unusual for a player of his age and talent to regress, especially when all the other ones improved… We were puzzled”. Then coach Vanderbush was silent for few seconds and added “When I found out he was a chronic masturbator and his hand was turning into a claw, I was baffled… I couldn’t believe he would throw away a pro career just to play with his pipi!” Slowly over the years, Boucher started to control his urges and was able to regain his power shot, giving him the opportunity to play point for the Shocker’s. [Marc Boucher] “It was a dark period for me, I had so much testosterone and there was just no trim in St-Hyacinthe. I had to do everything myself, sacrifying my velvet hands for a moment of pleasure.” Boucher doesn’t enjoy revisiting the past and prefers avoiding the subject. [Boucher] “I’m focusing on my second season as a Shocker and can’t wait for the season to resume. It’s been a few weeks since our last game, the NABHL is a real mess this year, no wonder teams are considering signing elsewhere.” Other Shocker players have voiced their discontent towards the league [Jeff Jasmin] “This league is broken down… So broken even tape couldn’t fix it! Let’s just hope that Boucher can control his urges and doesn’t start beating off his **** like it owes him money.”


You can all come and cheer for the Shocker’s next Monday when the season resumes. Marc “The Claw” will be looking to rip it from the point…



Until then, keep your eyes on the ball and your stick on the floor kids…